Grief is a human response to a significant loss. The grieving process is a journey and as such can be a challenging time of questioning and reassessing our life, as well as that of our loved one and our relationship with them.
Our views and beliefs can be changed or reconsidered. This is all a natural part of grieving.
To begin, you may feel as though everything is unreal; that you are in a complete daze. Few people understand what is normal after a loss. Some expect us to get over it relatively quickly. As they see us apparently being strong during the funeral, often they are surprised when, later on, we may not seem to be doing quite as well. They confuse shock with strength.
There are times on this journey when you will be reminded of your loved one by events, a conversation, some music or a sight or smell which brings a memory to the forefront of your mind. It could be meeting a mutual friend. This can take you back to the early days of your grief. It can be painful, but again it is a natural part of grieving. Certain dates, some of which are personal to you, such as anniversaries, birthdays and Christmas bring many memories to mind.
In time these memories, if happy, can bring a great solace to you when you remember the good times. When things feel really difficult it can be good to talk to someone. This may be a family member or friend, but also a church minister, valued spiritual teacher or doctor can help. Cruse Bereavement Care, the charity for the bereaved offers a service in which you may talk things through with an experienced counsellor, if you feel that would help. Please contact us if you would like details of this or other helpful services for the bereaved.